Review: Guinevere's Truth

If all you knew of me was a list of my favorite TV shows, I'm pretty sure you'd guess I was a huge fan of sci-fi and fantasy novels. But, surprisingly, you'd be wrong. Ashley the Iconoclast strikes again (what a lame comic book that'd be)!

Sure, I enjoy a good sci-fi novel now and again--although I don't much care for ones based on TV shows because I'd rather just watch the show. But fantasy I am quite discriminating of, and this anthology by Jennifer Roberson I find to be a good portrait (Dorian Gray style) of what I dislike about the genre.

Genre: short story anthology (fantasy)

Plot: Roberson strives to have some variety in her plots, and to some degree she achieves this. The "some" should be a tip off to you. She has a various amount of settings, but the main characters are predominantly strong warrior-princesses women. I think this is, as she herself admits, partly because of the influence of Marion Zimmer Bradly on her.

Structure: Again, it varies due to the nature of the collection, but for the most part there are either extremely long "did I fall into a novel" stories, or short, almost inconsequential vignettes. Almost none of them felt "right," the way a good short story should feel. Fitting with the strong women theme, she mostly writes in the first person of her chosen heroine. This does little to persuade me against her actually writing of one woman's many past lives.

Execution: This is Roberson's main flaw. Despite her formal education, I just don't thinks he's very good at writing. Competent, yes; creative, at times. But definitely not good, which is especially puzzling considering she's the author of multiple multi-volume series. I found myself describing her style as vapid, pointless, wooden, and laughable in the non-intended way. Most of all wooden. There's just no spirit, no clever play of words that make her stories sparkle. All of her heroines felt very much like the same rip-off of the aforementioned Bradley (and warrior princess), and all the men felt like the same generic guy written over and over and over again, like a bad extra being used too many times.

Theme:Roberson rarely moves from the traditional, tried-and-true (I guess) fantasy themes--Arthur, Robin Hood, a nondescript medieval place, Norse mythology, and the strong, goddess-worshiping women who inhabit such places. She does have some more imaginative forays into modern settings, but for the most part I found them all terribly tired.

Read this if you like Marion Zimmer Bradley, or have a particular penchant for fantasy but want to hold off on your next 450 page epic. If you're not already a fan of the genre, I doubt this will do much to win you over.

1 out of 5 stars

Other works:
well, see for yourself

If you liked this, you might also like:
Margo Lanagan's Red Spikes and Black Juices anthologies
Marion Zimmer Bradley's Swords and Sorceresses anthologies

Review: The Sex Lives of Cannibals

I have seriously been trying to write this review for three days. Who knew being unemployed would be so time consuming?

A few weeks ago I posted an author alert on J. Maarten Troost. When I saw my local library this volume, I almost tripped over several small children trying to get it to the check out desk. This light, uproariously funny, and just plain weird travel memoir was well worth risking a few lawsuits over, as it recounts the adventures of one post-graduate loafer and his aid-working, beguiling girlfriend as they adapt to life on The Republic of Kiribati. Don't worry if you've never heard of it before; you're not stupid, it's just that small.

Genre: travelogue/memoir

Plot: Unlike most travel books, which set out to have some spiritual truth revealed to the author while describing the grandeur of Italy at great lengths, this one cuts the bull and strives to tell it like it is. Sort of. With a lot of humorous, I hope that's an exaggeration but I think it probably isn't anecdotes. While there are no profound epiphanies about the state of man, there are some rather insightful thoughts here and there between rants about La Macarena.

Structure: A first person narration segmented into tongue-in-cheek paragraph-titled chapters, of which I believe there was 20. Mostly these focused on grouping a few anecdotes together, which provided both a unifying structure and a brevity feeling to the overall work.

Execution and Style: A little crass and a lot sarcastic, it's sort of what you'd expect if Dennis Leary had to write a travel magazine. A lot of historical/literary allusions, and a lot of cynicism make it appealing to intellectualists, but a lot of almost slap-stick funny anecdotes make it palatable to the masses.

Theme: the pacific islands, traveling, travel humor, la macarena

Read This If: you need a good laugh while recovering from that sunburn on the beach last week, or if you wondered what Gilligan's Island would be like with pot.

4 out of 5 stars.

Other Works:
Lost on Planet China
Getting Stoned with Savages


If you liked this, you might also like:
Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love (it is more serious, but it has funny moments)

Review: Moloka'i

Years ago, as was my habit then, I was wandering about aimlessly in Barnes & Noble while waiting on an appointment when I came across Moloka'i by Alan Brennert. I was intrigued and liked the first chapter, but when I put it back on the shelf for all intents and purposes it became lost to me. I would try fruitlessly to search for "hawaiian books about leprosy with a big pink flower on the cover" without any luck. It wasn't until the middle of a sermon illustration at my church when someone mentioned "Molokai" that it clicked, and I have to say, the book was well worth the wait. It follows the life of Rachel Kalama, a young Hawaiian girl living at the turn of the 19th century diagnosed with Hansen's disease and sent to live on the infamous leper colony, Kaulapapa. But there's plenty in this vast novel about the regular routines of life, friends, family, World War II and racism.

Genre: Novel

Plot: the plot was quite good for its "slice of life" genre of historical fiction; deep characterization was sprinkled with some unexpected twists to make it a satisfying, though somewhat linear, read. In other words, it was good the first time around, but not really worth rereading. I do praise him particularly for having tackled so vast a subject (one person's whole life) in an engaging, quick way. This was not a Ken Follett novel, but nor was it focused on a small portion of her life, either. Equally, he chose to write about both the grief and the joy of life, and struck a pleasant balance between the two.

Structure: The story is centered on Rachel Kalama, from roughly age 7 until the end of her life; with such a large scope, the chapters would have been unwiedly but Brennert wisely chose instead to tell a few significant scenes from a group of years. The overall effect was a large collection of colorful anecdotes woven together, such as when grandparents tell stories of their own lives. It was a pleasing touch, especially with the highlights of Hawaiian legend and political/historical details added to really enhance the narration.

Execution and Style: Brennert was a competent, capable storyteller; he was neither overly grandiose as some would be tempted to revert to in describing the Hawaiian backdrop, but nor was he particularly innovative. He did treat the descriptions of the medical victims with both candor and tenderness, which is one of his greatest strengths. We are told of their plight but in a way that is neither demeaning nor superficial. He sprinkled in a few native Hawaiian words which could have been a major pitfall, but he executed the device well enough.

Theme: Hawaii, especially Hawaii right before it became a United State; leprosy; World War II (Pearl Harbor, Japanese internment camps); Hawaiian mythology

Read This If: you're not afraid of a tear-jerking historical fiction, or ever wondered what Magnum, P.I. would be like with less cheese and more medical traumas.

4 out of 5 stars.

Other Works:
Honolulu
Kindred Spirits
Time and Chance

If you liked this, you might also like:
John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath
Kathleen Tyau's Makai
Kiana Davenport's House of Many Gods
Yoshiko Uchida's Picture Bride

Iliad 2.0

Yesterday I spent over 12 hours in a Uhaul. I occupied some of that time reading a book on the classics. When my fiancé Nicholas asked, "so what did Paris do after Helen was taken from him?" I jauntily proceeded to retell the Iliad in the most ghetto fabulous way ever as a war between preps and gang lords (warning, some language used for comedic effect):

So Zeus got word from an oracle that one of his sons would bustacap in him, just like he did to his father. So he finds out that Prometheus knows and tortures him to find out which ho he gots to avoid. Turns out it's Thetis, so he shacks her up with Peleus. Unfortunately Zeus forgot to invite Eris, the goddess of discord, at this big Olympian shotgun wedding sort of like that one bad fairy in Sleeping Beauty. Anyway, this royal goddess like totally snubs them by throwing an apple marked "to the fairest" into the mix, and a mega catfight ensues.

Athena, Aprhodite, and Hera claw the other girls out of the running and go to Zeus to pick the coolest shorty of them all. But Zeus knows Hera will be a royal bitch if she doesn't get picked, so he's all like, "I ain't touchin' that bitches." All the other gods do too. So these three catty women all find Paris, this shepherd/frat boy/playa in Troy. They each promise him like, a whole hood to himself, or a badass reputation, or the love of the most beautiful ho in the whole world. Paris picks the last prize and Aphrodite gets the apple. She forgot to tell him that this girl, Helen, is actually already married.

See, Helen was so damn beautiful, her daddy was battin' off playas left and right. So he finally made them all have this big aggro fight and swear they ain't gonna go after the winner. Menelaus brushes all the other haters off and gets the girl. Yay for him.

But then Paris rolls up and is all like, "ho, come ride wif me" and she's all like "okay pimp" so they go back to Troy. Menelaus is all like, "dude that is messed up" so he goes to his brother Agamemnon and is like "go get us a crew and let's go kick Trojan ass."

So they assemble ALL their homies and storm down to the Trojan hood, except that well, it's a really rich hood so they have this huge wall. The Greek gang can't get in, so they basically tool around for 10 Freakin' Years.

In the middle of year 10, the Greeks are stormin' down this one town and they take a girl named Chryseis to be one of their hoes. But Chrysie's dad is like, this major big shot and stuff, so he offers all these Benjamins to get her back. When they don't give her, he calls down some networking skills and gets this nasty virus spread around them. So then they're all like, "oh snap what do we do?" and their oracle dude Calchas is all like, "give back Chrysie" so Agamemnon is all like, "well if I give her back one of y'all's gonna give me a bitch" and Achilles is like "that's so like you, dawg, you always be trippin on us." So then Achilles and Agamemnon have this huge aggro and Achilles goes off and pouts in his crib.

So since Achilles isn't fighting anymore, the Trojans are all like "sweet action!" and go down and really lay on the smack on the Greeks. Caps be bustin' every which way. So Agamemnon goes to Achilles' cousin, Patroclus, and is all like, "yo dawg, put on Achilles' chains and roll up in his chariot and they'll get all shitfaced." So he does, except, the Trojans totally call his bluff and he dies.

So then Achilles gets uber-pissed and starts slaughtering everyone. All the homies just about die. So then Hector, the best Trojan prince of all, he goes out and fights Achilles and gets killed, but then Paris kills Achilles, so everyone's dead now.

So Odysseus, the smart one, he comes up with this ghetto-tastic plan. They build this big-ass horse and leave it in front of the gates, and the rest of the Greek crews go sailing off. The Trojans think they won and so they have this all-night rave and get hammered. But then the Greeks totally bust down the horse doors and bust everyone's balls and basically take over the Trojan hood. Except for this one dude, Aeneas, but that's a whole nother story.

And so all the Trojans were killed but their condoms were good so the Greeks took all those and went home. Which is actually yet another story.

Review: La Cucina

Ah, Sicily: land of great food, great wine, and large women who enjoy them. Rosa Fiore is one such woman, who leaves her quaint, anecdote-laden family farm for an even quainter city after the murder of her lover. Many years later, her drab life gets a breath of fresh air when L’Inglese, her English lover, ignites her passion in the kitchen and in the bedroom.

Genre: Novel

Plot: This was one of the rare books that I initially disliked but grew to enjoy as the story progressed. Usually, if I don’t like something within 50 pages, I put it down. I don’t care how famous it is or how much controversy it’s caused; if it’s not gripping me within 50 pages I’m not going to read it. By the end of the first section, I couldn’t really see the point of reading on (everything seemed so neatly tied together), but I’m certainly glad I did. This charming, almost quaint novel actually packed some deep surprises by the end!

Structure: The novel is told by Rosa Fiore in the first person. It’s divided unequally between 4 periods of her life, named after the four seasons in nature, with the bulk of it occurring in section 3. Perhaps the best choice on the author’s part is that the majority of the story happens to Rosa in middle age. In a world where staying 17 forever is the ultimate fantasy, this is like a breath of fresh, hormone-free air. The book also employs in media res, my absolute favorite literary device when used correctly and my most abhorred when not. Thankfully, Prior did it right.

Execution and Style: Prior’s first chapters start strong, but as I mentioned earlier, by the end of the first chapter it seemed oddly flat. There was no hook to keep reading other than the bulk of pages behind my hands. Only in the middle did she begin to throw out chunks of suspense and unanswered questions.

Also, there’s a fine line between authors building a sense of authenticity when mixing two languages (in this case, English and Italian) and, conversely, just coming off as know-it-alls. Prior fell in the latter half. In fact, her constant switching between the two actually caused some mental disorientation. I kept asking myself, why is this Italian woman thinking in English?

Scores of characters make an appearance throughout, but remarkably, none feel too flat (even the pervert bank manager, who emerges only to masturbate in the adjacent window to the action). This large cast of comical, quaint characters—along with the dreamy, larger-than-life events that kept occurring (a fire caused by a sex dream which gets the whole town horny?)—almost enticed me to go off in search of an Italian farm to work on. But the most important secondary character of all was the food constantly streaming from Rosa’s hands. Prior did a wonderful job of interjecting long, descriptive recipes in prose form; I’m pretty sure I actually salivated at one point.

Theme: Large Italian women cooking large Italian meals pretty much sums this one up. But if that’s not enough for you, there’s also the Mafia, libraries, chattery grandmas, horny grandpas, pizza millionaires, clairvoyant Siamese twins, and James Bond-like English spies/lovers. And the food. Did I mention the food?

Read This If: you love Italian cooking, or are looking for a “feel good” type of story but lent Chocolat to a friend. A word of caution, though; if you’re expecting a serious historical fiction novel about true-life 1960s Italy, this isn’t for you. Seriously, it’s a great read that’s just quiet enough for a relaxing break between suspense/thriller novels but wth just enough excitement to be worth your while.

3 out of 5 stars.

Other Works:
Cabaret
Nectar
Ardor

If you liked this, you might also like:
Joanne Harris’ Chocolat
Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat Pray Love
Natsumi Ando and Miyuki Kobayashi’s Kitchen Princess series (manga)

Review: Rasputin's Daughter

I’ve never been a huge fan of those “_______’s Daughter” (it’s a literary meme by now) books, mostly because the few I’ve tried left me rather unimpressed. So when I saw this volume by Robert Alexander, I was intrigued but not hopeful. By story’s close, however, I was left breathlessly closing one of the best books I’ve read this year. Alexander presents a story of the infamous Rasputin’s final days through the ever-changing eyes of his daughter, Maria, who is inevitably caught up in palace intrigue and secret societies herself.

Genre: Novel

Plot: One word sums it up: gripping. I’ve never read a character-driven novel such as this with so much suspense. Or, I guess conversely, I’ve never read a suspense novel laden with so much characterization. Either way, it was incredibly good, and one of the few books I can truly use the cliché “page-turner” on. The fact that educated readers will know what happened to Rasputin in no way diminishes the storytelling which is, in my opinion, the mark of an excellent writer.

Structure: The narrative structure is mostly story-within-a-story, as Maria Rasputin recounts her father’s last days upon request to another character. Maria’s recollections are interspersed with mysterious, foreshadowing interjections by an unknown narrator revealed only at the very last paragraph, which makes for a rather exciting element of mystery in the narration enhancing mystery in the characters themselves. On a technical note, each (each!) chapter ends on a significant and haunting note that successfully pushes the reader forward or creates a yearning to keep reading.

Execution and Style: Alexander has mastered the balance so many historical fiction authors struggle with: how to write an English novel with a non-English-language-setting. Put in too much italicized vocabulary, and the reader is lost. Put in too little, however, and the La Cucina effect occurs: why is this (blank)-speaking character thinking in English?

Alexander’s superb style immerses you not just in Russian language, but in Russian thinking, and yet somehow does so without feeling blocky or wooden. Alexander also excels at voice. 17-year-old Maria living at the early part of the 20th century actually reads like her, not a modern man trying very hard to become her.

What I found most interesting about this book though, and what really pushes it high up on the list for me, is how Maria’s vision of her father keeps shifting from naïve adoration to disgust to finally a mix of both. Alexander is not content to paint us a picture of a cleverly connived Rasputin; instead, he strives to give us a complex portrait of an undoubtedly complicated man.


Theme: The final days of Tsarist Russia, but also fathers and daughters. It touches briefly on Christian sects of Russia, too.


Read This If: you like good historical fiction, good suspense, or good character-driven stories. Seriously, I can hardly think of a reader out there who wouldn’t enjoy it on some level, but I suppose if you are a really big fan of this era of history, you will enjoy it the most.

5 out of 5 stars.


Other Works:
The Kitchen Boy – his first novel about this period
The Romanov Bride – his latest
The Todd Mills Mysteries (written as R. D. Zimmerman)

If you liked this, you might also like:
Sarah Dunant’s The Birth of Venus

Author Alert! J. Maarten Troost

Every once in a while I find myself in a bookstore, idly wandering the shelves and noting books of particular interest to me. I have to say that despite the proverb, I usually do judge my books by their covers.

So you can imagine why someone like me, who is always looking for a laugh and has spent some time in China, couldn't resist peeking into the pages of Lost on Planet China by J. Maarten Troost.

The guy is hilarious. Several times I chortled and chuckled and quoted lengthy passages to my fiance, who I'm sure was half-amused half-annoyed by my persistent interruptions. He soooo well captures the bizarre, almost inexplicable spirit of being in China; the befuddling contradictions and culture confusion that so pervades even the simple(?) act of crossing the street or watching television.

He makes me laugh, but he also makes me smile in fond memory. I can't wait to read more of his stuff, and I think you should too!